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:iconsapphireeyes: More from SapphireEyes




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April 14, 2011
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One could almost see stink lines emanate from the Thin White Duke's creasing brow.  He had so generously offered to make dinner for the other personae, had slaved all afternoon in the kitchen, and now here the personae sat, barely nibbling at the main course.

His eyes flashed when they caught sight of Major Celliers chewing on the petals of a rose he had plucked from the centerpiece.  "Found something more palatable than my stuffed red peppers, Major?"

"Oh, I wouldn't say more palatable," Celliers replied with his own eyes twinkling and his lips half-smiling.  "But you've offered us no traditional scoop of sherbet between courses, and I have to cleanse my palate somehow."

"He has a point," said fellow military man Lieutenant Paul Von Przygodsky.  "There is a certain sameness to your cooking.  I mean, a salad of red peppers drizzled with red pepper vinaigrette followed by roasted red pepper soup followed by stuffed red peppers, with candied red peppers for dessert?  And the stuffed red peppers are stuffed with more red peppers!  It's ridiculous!"

"I told you I was cooking the foods I eat," the Duke replied.  "This diet of mine has served me well for years now…"

"Red peppers and skim milk," whispered Thomas Jerome Newton (who was already developing heartburn and unwrapping a roll of antacids) to Julian Priest.  "Now we know what makes the Duke so thin…"

"And here I thought it was just a side effect of the cocaine," Julian replied.  "Well, his diet might be…"

Sir Roland Moorecock was bolder with his commentary.  "I've seen more variety and imagination at a Steven Seagal film festival!  With cooking like this you ought to be the Thin White Dishwasher instead!"

The resulting argument between Sir Roland and the Duke was enough of a distraction for the other personae to slip out and order a delivery of Chinese food instead.
More fun in the David Bowie-character based "Cracked Actor" universe. Characters here are:

The Thin White Duke ("Station to Station"/1976 tour)
Major Jack Celliers ("Merry Christmas, Mr. Lawrence")
Lieutenant Paul Von Przygodsky ("Just a Gigolo")
Thomas Jerome Newton ("The Man Who Fell to Earth")
Julian Priest ("The Hunger" TV series)
Sir Roland Moorecock ("Dream On")
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:iconmidnaoftwilight3519:
MidnaofTwilight3519 Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
AW! Poor Duke-y..I love it, though! I can't decide whether to laugh, or cry in pity for him!
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:iconsapphireeyes:
SapphireEyes Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2011
I would laugh, myself. That Duke needs to be taken down a peg!
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:iconmidnaoftwilight3519:
MidnaofTwilight3519 Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
nuuuu! Why? XD I've always loved your work, though, so glad I'm watching you!
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:iconmarissasunshine:
MarissaSunshine Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2011  Hobbyist Filmographer
That's EXACTLY what Sir Roland would say!!
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:iconsapphireeyes:
SapphireEyes Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2011
I know, right?!?
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:iconvampireoftheopera:
VampireOfTheOpera Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2011
Beautiful work, as usual!
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:iconsapphireeyes:
SapphireEyes Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2011
Wow, you think my work is beautiful? I'm so touched!
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:iconkimbocarr:
kimbocarr Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
hahaha this is superbly awesome! XD
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:iconsapphireeyes:
SapphireEyes Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2011
Thank you, and thanks to everybody for all the positive comments!
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:iconsam-apples:
Sam-Apples Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Haha I love it.
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